Asher Kagen

Asher Kagen Application

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The award for the most dumpster PL recruit of 2016 goes to...






















































































Yeah, its you. This is probably the worst app I've ever seen. Go ahead and drop corp before its too late. Don't bother moving. 


By the way, I hear Bat Country is recruiting.

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Also, I usually don't post in other corp's  recruitment threads, but holy shit. If you say "all but a few titans/supercarriers elude your grasp", why can't you fly a Hictor, or make a fit for one?

Every single fit you bothered posting is honestly laughably bad... 

This is a dumpster fire of an app, and I'd like to personally extend a thank you to you for making my corp's recruitment standards look amazing in comparison.

Edited by Avery Lewis

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17 minutes ago, Avery Lewis said:

Also, I usually don't post in other corp's  recruitment threads, but holy shit. If you say "all but a few titans/supercarriers elude your grasp", why can't you fly a Hictor, or make a fit for one?

Every single fit you bothered posting is honestly laughably bad... 

This is a dumpster fire of an app, and I'd like to personally extend a thank you to you for making my corp's recruitment standards look amazing in comparison.

 

Rattlesnake.jpg

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So it's not that we don't want you in HABIT, don't that interpretation. We just don't want you in our alliance. 

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2 minutes ago, Doomchinchilla said:

So it's not that we don't want you in HABIT, don't that interpretation. We just don't want you in our alliance. 

rUGRtXU.gif

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7 hours ago, Nan VanDoom said:

just to recap for those playing at home

 

you're joining PL with a single character and are 

 

eaba10a27b06717c829a8f44c845c8f3.pngeaba10a27b06717c829a8f44c845c8f3.pngeaba10a27b06717c829a8f44c845c8f3.pngeaba10a27b06717c829a8f44c845c8f3.pngeaba10a27b06717c829a8f44c845c8f3.pngeaba10a27b06717c829a8f44c845c8f3.png

 

single plate legions are bad, but cloaky legions are far worse 

 

pve tengu is not a lr hac/t3 or mach

 

why even bother right, you're already in corp xDDDDDDD

 

what ships are you flying? what are their fits? who are you cynoing in? what are their fits?

 

how do you moonwalk to the gate after activating a cyno? did you know that activating a cyno immobilizes your ship for 10 minutes?

 

Nice! Im already winning awards!
Kudos on your ability to press 'quote'.. Because you made the effort to critique, I'll respond in kind:

The running joke during the fitting section was three-fold 
1. I should. only be. trusted. in a pod
2. Sarcastic proof of the above. Each fail-fit was taken from my killboard as the worst I could find. If you note the dates, most fittings are years old and were my first attempts at learning to fit (or the fits were suggested by corp/fleet members at the time). Ship fitting meta constantly changes and my SP likely dictated that I was limited to a shit fit that needed to explode.

3. There is little point me trying to answer fitting questions when I clearly state that PVP isnt my core EVE activity. I read other apps and decided that humour would work better in this case. WRONG! I seem to have stumbled across the most humourless pocket in all of eve..
What you NEED to know:
- I WILL attend every ping to fleet up that I possibly can
- I WILL fly the proper doctrines and participate in as many roles as I can to support the fleet
- I will follow my FC without question
- I WILL drink and shit talk in comms but when it comes to fleet time, spaceships is serious business!

NB:
I applied with my main account. I know I'll need alts. This is what Alpha clones are for.
Why cant I fly dictors etc? Simple, because I train for things that are useful at the time. If its a requirement that I can fly a hictor or dictor now, I WILL train it because its useful at the time.
Re: your fitting questions, at my current level of PVP skill I'm unlikely to find myself roaming solo. I'm more likely to be flying in a fleet/small gang and doing as I'm told (a good way to learn). No drama, no fuss! 
YES I'm aware how a cyno works. I'm a verbose mutherfuker but if you read that section again you will see that I'm applying liberal amounts of creative licence. 

I put it to you guys, that if I'm apparently SO bad at EVE (and an utter shit poster) I challenge you to take me under your wing, teach me what you know so that I can enhance YOUR gameplay.
What your application process doesnt highlight is that Im actually a nice guy. Supportive too and always up for a laugh. I heard HABIT members were similar..

The fail app thread continues..
 

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33 minutes ago, Asher Kagen said:

I put it to you guys, that if I'm apparently SO bad at EVE (and an utter shit poster) I challenge you to take me under your wing, teach me what you know so that I can enhance YOUR gameplay.

There's this cool group called horde where PL guys can mentor you. You should try it.

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Hello

The Bhaalgorn is a faction battleship that utilises both long range webs and strong neuts to control and kill its opponents.

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1 minute ago, Bluemelon said:

Hello

The Bhaalgorn is a faction battleship that utilises both long range webs and strong neuts to control and kill its opponents.

i wish id killed myself before reading this app

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11 minutes ago, Bluemelon said:

Hello

The Bhaalgorn is a faction battleship that utilises both long range webs and strong neuts to control and kill its opponents

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2 minutes ago, Doomchinchilla said:
14 minutes ago, Bluemelon said:

Hello

The Bhaalgorn is a faction battleship that utilises both long range webs and strong neuts to control and kill its opponents

 

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2 hours ago, Asher Kagen said:

Nice! Im already winning awards!
Kudos on your ability to press 'quote'.. Because you made the effort to critique, I'll respond in kind:

The running joke during the fitting section was three-fold 
1. I should. only be. trusted. in a pod
2. Sarcastic proof of the above. Each fail-fit was taken from my killboard as the worst I could find. If you note the dates, most fittings are years old and were my first attempts at learning to fit (or the fits were suggested by corp/fleet members at the time). Ship fitting meta constantly changes and my SP likely dictated that I was limited to a shit fit that needed to explode.

3. There is little point me trying to answer fitting questions when I clearly state that PVP isnt my core EVE activity. I read other apps and decided that humour would work better in this case. WRONG! I seem to have stumbled across the most humourless pocket in all of eve..
What you NEED to know:
- I WILL attend every ping to fleet up that I possibly can
- I WILL fly the proper doctrines and participate in as many roles as I can to support the fleet
- I will follow my FC without question
- I WILL drink and shit talk in comms but when it comes to fleet time, spaceships is serious business!

NB:
I applied with my main account. I know I'll need alts. This is what Alpha clones are for.
Why cant I fly dictors etc? Simple, because I train for things that are useful at the time. If its a requirement that I can fly a hictor or dictor now, I WILL train it because its useful at the time.
Re: your fitting questions, at my current level of PVP skill I'm unlikely to find myself roaming solo. I'm more likely to be flying in a fleet/small gang and doing as I'm told (a good way to learn). No drama, no fuss! 
YES I'm aware how a cyno works. I'm a verbose mutherfuker but if you read that section again you will see that I'm applying liberal amounts of creative licence. 

I put it to you guys, that if I'm apparently SO bad at EVE (and an utter shit poster) I challenge you to take me under your wing, teach me what you know so that I can enhance YOUR gameplay.
What your application process doesnt highlight is that Im actually a nice guy. Supportive too and always up for a laugh. I heard HABIT members were similar..

The fail app thread continues..
 

You're not supposed to meme or 'just pretend to be retarded' in applications to PL. If you want a better reception, instead of going "I'm a nice person! I can learn in PL", which is NOT the purpose of PL, it's the purpose of WAFFLES or the HORDE mentor program, why don't you try re-posting your application with actual fits you've tried on, including a Hictor and a RR Battleship fit, and giving proper answers to questions that aren't just "xD le Epic Meme I Cyno And PL Drop Supers!" (which, by the way, reflects a complete lack of understanding of how supers work and how PL functions in general.) 

Oh, and there's no 'standing fleets' in PL, and alpha clones will never be able to satisfy the type of alts that PL requires (we don't need T1 frigate or T1 cruiser alts.) Hope this helps.

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It does help. Thankyou
I checked other apps before entering mine. Its likely I misread or misunderstood the importance of such questions and due to nerves, reacted in poor humour. 
Im not good at fitting. I guess thats something I will now look into.
Thanks again for a straight answer

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37 minutes ago, Toshiro Umezawa said:

 

I still don't get why you're here other than this is a immense troll. Which is fairly rude to you too. Just save us the time. 

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you misunderstand newfriend

 

the purpose of a forum app is to follow directions and as this is your first foray into big boy posting i'll cut you some slack

 

here we go

 

how can we trust you to:

 

2 hours ago, Asher Kagen said:

- I WILL attend every ping to fleet up that I possibly can
- I WILL fly the proper doctrines and participate in as many roles as I can to support the fleet
- I will follow my FC without question

 

when you so very clearly can't or won't follow a simple set of directions, a la forum app

 

2 hours ago, Asher Kagen said:

1. I should. only be. trusted. in a pod

 

based on your record as a pilot, i don't even trust you to login properly

 

2 hours ago, Asher Kagen said:

2. Sarcastic proof of the above. Each fail-fit was taken from my killboard as the worst I could find. If you note the dates, most fittings are years old and were my first attempts at learning to fit (or the fits were suggested by corp/fleet members at the time). Ship fitting meta constantly changes and my SP likely dictated that I was limited to a shit fit that needed to explode.

 

~~~sarcasm guys~~~

 

this actually gets my goat 10/10

 

it physically pains me to read posting like this and seeing as the vast majority don't know you, or have ever had any interaction with you, it might have been a good idea to not play the LOL I'M FUNNY card

 

talking about your strengths/weaknesses in a serious manner would have gotten a lot of praise 

 

2 hours ago, Asher Kagen said:

3. There is little point me trying to answer fitting questions when I clearly state that PVP isnt my core EVE activity. I read other apps and decided that humour would work better in this case. WRONG! I seem to have stumbled across the most humourless pocket in all of eve..

 

claiming humor and sarcasm as your defense is a cop out

 

keep grasping for straws, you might find a dick in there, but oh well, you know what to do

 

2 hours ago, Asher Kagen said:

NB:
I applied with my main account. I know I'll need alts. This is what Alpha clones are for.

 

based on the current ccptalk, we won't be able to use an alpha clone and a regular char at the same time 

 

the same trial char/subbed char system will apply

 

don't mistake me though, there is literally nothing you can do with an alpha clone that will benefit this corp or alliance

 

take that as you will

 

2 hours ago, Asher Kagen said:

Why cant I fly dictors etc? Simple, because I train for things that are useful at the time. If its a requirement that I can fly a hictor or dictor now, I WILL train it because its useful at the time.

 

every pvp alliance worth it's salt requires this smh

 

2 hours ago, Asher Kagen said:

Re: your fitting questions, at my current level of PVP skill I'm unlikely to find myself roaming solo. I'm more likely to be flying in a fleet/small gang and doing as I'm told (a good way to learn). No drama, no fuss! 

 

at your current level of pvp, i'd be hard pressed to put you in horde for fear of you rage quitting under all that pressure 

 

2 hours ago, Asher Kagen said:

YES I'm aware how a cyno works. I'm a verbose mutherfuker but if you read that section again you will see that I'm applying liberal amounts of creative licence.

 

creativity within reason this was not

 

verbose

 

lmao

 

and then you misspell motherfucker 

 

is this actually a joke

 

are we getting pranked

 

2 hours ago, Asher Kagen said:

I put it to you guys, that if I'm apparently SO bad at EVE (and an utter shit poster) I challenge you to take me under your wing, teach me what you know so that I can enhance YOUR gameplay.
What your application process doesnt highlight is that Im actually a nice guy. Supportive too and always up for a laugh. I heard HABIT members were similar..

 

i put this to you

 

make a new thread 

 

delete what you had written and start again

 

make it serious

 

we don't care if the fits/answers are boring same old same old

 

your job here is to follow directions

 

not apply some special snowflake coat of paint that only your group of friends will understand

 

 

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the blastx one was better df98fe0272cf0cdff6fef4c224f2f4ce.png 

However, your posting has made it painfully clear why you apped to HABIT instead of SNIGG

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I understand. Thank you for your frank and honest feedback.
This has honestly not been a troll. I have utterly misunderstood the process and i apologise for wasting your time. 
Following my recent departure from HORDE for RL reasons, I was in the process of working up to applying to PL proper. One evening Elise visited the chat of a stream that I take part in and after finding out how interested I was in joining HABIT, he sent me a corp invite. I excitedly accepted.
This was utterly unexpected but should explain why I have been in corp for 5 days already. My application schedule had to accelerate and in my rush, Ive unintentionally alienated most of you.
For this I apologise. 
Im a mature adult, I should've taken a step back and known better. Its obvious that i am woefully unprepared for this experience.
I wont waste your time further and hope that when I re-apply in future, I am able to do alot better. 
best regards
 

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